The ten commandments of the Cult of Climatology September 28, 2008Posted by honestclimate in humour.
Tags: climate change, Global Cooling, global warming, humor, humour
The ten commandments of the Cult of Climatology
By the blogowner, honestclimate, September 28, 2008
1.) First things first as the globe has not warmed for 10 years, we no longer use the term global warming, from now on use the term climate change.
2.) Defend the hockey stick at all costs, the fact that it contained a Y2K bug and that you could put in numbers from a telephone book to get the hockey stick is irrelevant, the hockey stick is not broken.
3.) There is nothing climate change can’t do, this includes heat waves, storms, cyclones, floods, droughts etc.
4.) Refer to record cold temperatures as simply “weather”. The word snow is now strictly verboten, and will be referred to as “soft hail” in the future.
5.) Never, ever debate the other side as this will cause embarrassment, as seen in the Littlemore vs Monckton debate.
6.) Refuse to peer review or publish any papers by the skeptics, we don’t want the public to think for themselves. Unfortunately the internet is one area in which skeptics have had a voice. We cannot allow this to continue. Al Gore, the inventor of the internet, will be deleting all such websites. Judging by the volume of these sorts of vile websites, this is expected to be completed by the year 2020.
7.) If a colleague questions the commandments, remove all their funding or even better get them fired.
8.) The best form of defence is attack. Be sure to refer to all skeptics as deluded, Holocaust deniers, having their heads in the sand etc.
9.) Accuse all skeptics of being in the pay of big oil and never ever admit that the climate change industry is a billion dollar industry.
10.) Spend everyday worshipping the Goreacle, make sure to watch An Inconvenient Truth at least once a day to ensure you keep the faith.
11.) Blame Natural events, like La Nina, for “masking” the warming, wait……. scrap that.
If you have any questions regarding the above, please contact one of our 12 apostles, namely:
Al Gore, James Hansen, Michael Mann, Stephen Schneider, Rajendra Pachauri, Jean-Pascal van Ypersele, Tim Flannery, David Karoly, Barry Brooks, Kevin Rudd, Penny Wong and Tony Jones.